In her youth, Heather was celebrated for her beauty, intelligence and creativity. She received scholarships to university, and proudly put herself through school accepting greater roles of responsibility in her field of ophthalmology, first at Toronto Sick Kids, then in Stockholm, Sweden where she helped open a Swedish school of ophthalmology. Heather met her husband in Sweden and encouraged his passion for law. They lived in Sweden, England, Germany and Switzerland and had three daughters. Heather spoke many languages, celebrated food enthusiastically and was an excellent cook. She loved to paint, and had success as an artist with many gallery showings in Europe and Canada. Her marriage came to a heartbreaking end, and she moved back to Victoria to raise her three young daughters on her own.
As a single mother she braved humiliation and poverty and taught us the importance of standing up to be heard in a man’s world, to lead with kindness, and to advocate for those less fortunate. She got involved in federal politics and worked for a federal Minister during the Chretien Government. She proudly advocated for the rights of all Canadians, and especially those of refugees and new comers. Her passion was helping others, she had a gift for meeting people undergoing their own suffering, and empathically understanding their pain. She would do everything she could to get families the resources they needed in order to survive. We remember fondly how she was often stopped on the streets by people she had helped thanking her for her dedicated work on their case.
Her legacy is profound to those who know her well. Heather conquered life’s struggles with hope, wisdom, grace, resilience and humour. She had a difficult marriage that taught her forgiveness, and an incurable diagnosis that taught her perseverance.
Thank you, mum, for all you did, and all you went through to give us a loving home, a good education, and a shot at a decent life. Thank you, mum, for fighting for our place in this world. You blazed a trail no one before you ever had. We are so proud of you mum, out of your brokenness you gave, and you taught us that
resilience and hope are the breath of faith. Thank you for the legacy you left that we are humble to inherit. We grieve in hope, and we will see you again – dancing on strong legs with the wind in your hair.
“We glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope” – Romans 5: 3,4
Please donate to the Mustard Seed Street Church or Red Cross, and in Heather’s honour, please do something kind for your neighbour. Condolences may be offered to the family below.
McCall Gardens
www.mccallgardens.com
Heather’s three angels – Cecilia, her heart; Monica, her advocate; Christina, her courage
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Penny-Claire Morris
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Kolleen Forstinger Dear Cecilia (Cilla), Monica, and Christina, Nigil and Roger
Let me introduce myself, I am Kolleen Forstinger and Heather and I met on a bus in Stockholm when I was an exchange student 1979-1980. Cecilia was 1 year old and Heather wa coming home from work and picking her up from the dagis-home daycare. I remember looking at Cecilia and speaking my very basic Swedish to her, and Heather asked me where I was from, “Canada!, I said. I live in St Catharines and work as a RN in mental health, but in those days, I was 17 and away from home, lonely and living with a family that wasn’t keen on having me. Heather invited me to her house for tea and I gladly became Cecilia’s babysitter. Later, Heather asked me to come and live with them while my exchange family got sorted out. Heather was generous, kind and caring. She was an academic (I later worked at The Hospital for Sick Children, not in Orthoptics but in a NICU and I thought about Heather and her work in Sweden. I witnessed first hand, how Heather couldn’t tolerate injustice, as she provided a safe haven for me. Further, Heather was an attentive and loving mom to Cilla, playing games on the ground and providing endless cuddles. In 1983 my husband and I visited Munich just after Heather delivered Christina and we met up with the family and went out to dinner. My regret is that I was unaware that Heather was back in Canada and what she endured after the collapse of her marriage. I am sorry for this. Over the years I have tried to find you Heather, writing letters which were returned. This Easter Sunday I stood in my kitchen remembering our Easter Egg hunt with Cecilia and I went to google, and found your obituary. I am sorry Cecilia. Monica, and Christina, that you lost your mom. I will hold her tightly in my heart. Much love Kollen (Redman) Forstinger
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Sarah gullins This is such a beautiful tribute to an amazing woman, it really echoes what I heard about her throughout the years. Monica, thinking of you and your sisters at this time and reflecting on how your mom passed on so much of herself in you. Your deep respect, love and support for your mom was always so clear to me. My sincere sympathies to you and your family.
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Sheri Smith My deepest condolences to your family and friends. I didn’t know you but from what I read you were an incredibly beautiful and astounding lady. I did, however, know Christina who then introduced me to Monica. You have raised some amazing daughters who are kind, funny and strong. Sending your family love and strength in this time of sadness.
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Hilary Groos It is so very sad to hear of Heather’s passing. Her ability to tackle head-on all the adversities life threw at her was simply astounding. She took it all on and we can all learn something from this. Our families were Norfolk Rd neighbours, we went to same school, then reconnected by pure chance when we were both living in Geneva in the late 80s. We shared and laughed at our own versions of life away from Victoria and I always marvelled at her ability to strike out wherever she would be, not to forget her talent and creativity that was exemplified through her art. Those sparkling blue eyes and cheerful laugh were always in the forefront and her move back to Victoria with her 3 girls was the right one. They have been her everything, supported by her family and close friends. Heather … Requiescat in pace.
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Sheri Dopierala I’m sad to hear of Heather’s passing. We shared many laughs and deep conversations during our visits. She was always very kind and welcoming and I was treated like family. Although, I hadn’t seen Heather for a year, I thought of her often.
Hugs and love to her girls❤️
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David Anderson Soon after her return to Victoria from Europe Heather came to work at my Victoria constituency office. Her job was to handle the inevitable requests for help of constituents who had been unable to navigate their way through the government system, or those who felt that their case or views had not been properly considered. Heather was untiring in her efforts of their behalf. Win or lose, Heather put heart and soul into the work, did everything she could to help. Naturally she was much loved as a result.
Sandra and I were greatly saddened to learn of her passing, and extend our condolences to the girls and to other members of the Bailey family.
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Catherine Stuart Monica,
My deepest condolences to you and your sisters. Your Mother is an inspirational woman with a fierce love to all those she touched – an ever-lasting imprint! It has been so long since I’ve seen you all but my memories remain solid in our years of friendship. I can remember how much your Mom welcomed me into your house for family dinners, movies, sleepovers and karaoke parties. Her warmth and motherly nurturance will always be appreciated and remembered as a gift in my childhood.
You are all in my thoughts as you continue to grieve and celebrate the extraordinary Mother she will always be.
Sincerely, Catherine Stuart (Crawford)
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Judy Crawford Dear Monica, It is with sadness that we read about your mothers death. We have many lovely memories of her and she shared enough with me that I was aware of many of her challenges. With grace and style she carried on always putting her three daughters first. She loved and was so very proud of all of you! I appreciated the trust that she placed on us to always look out for you and keep you safe and happy. And oh! How many wonderful memories we have of you and Catherine.
You are often in our thoughts and especially now in our prayers. Cherish the wonderful memories and trust that she is always close at hand.
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Jillian Smyth Jillian Smyth
Good-bye, my friend. I am glad we reconnected for a short time when our children went to Hillcrest Elementary. You were truly a good person and I am so glad you had three such loving daughters.
I will always remember the fun we had driving home from school in my little old, morris minor convertible.Condolences to the family.
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Fay and Phillip Russell To dear Olive, Nigel ,Roger ,and three special Daughters and all of the extended family.
I met Heather over tea at Olive’s with Celia whom I had taught many years before at Arbutus. Heather was an impressive mother whose story and life exemplified the spirit of those who have fought adversity. What a very special person Cecelia was and I knew that she reflected a wonderful upbringing by her mother whose love she shared with me. What a touching tribute they wrote to a a talented and tenacious mother.
I know that Heather was always in the hearts of Olive and Norman.
May all of the family know that I send my sincerest sympathies for your loss.
Fay and Phillip Russell
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Rosalind Jorgensen My deepest condolences to Olive, Roger – and the three angel daughters, whom I never met. What a wonderful testimony they have written about their mother!
I have very happy memories of meeting Heather again after she returned to Victoria, thanks to both Janet Andreae Bruce Homer.
All homage to the wonderful Bailey family. And may such brave and spirited, but humble, people continue to exist on this Earth!
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Tamara Murdoch Heather was my best friend in grade 8 and 9. We laughed, shared our secret crushes, spent lots of time at the RVYC and Willows beach. Years later we reconnected when she was visiting from Sweden with her three little girls. I still have the photo of Cecilia, Christina and Monica lined up by height with my three little boys eating ice cream cones by our pool. Heather was a warrior who never gave up. Life dealt her many blows but she gathered her girls, her parents, her brothers and her friends close and persevered. I will treasure the memories and am grateful for our last visit together a few years ago when we drank champagne, ate the beautiful hors d’oeuvres prepared and served by Chrissy, and laughed and cried as we remembered and shared one last time. Goodbye, dear friend.
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Dominique Chapheau May you Rest In Peace.
All our condolences to the Bailey’s family
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Bruce Homer The words describing Heather are so true. She contributed her heart, talent and wisdom to the world around her without reservation. Being her friend since we were teenagers was a privilege. It all started with walking our dogs, her Dachshunds and my Newfie, on Norfolk Road and from there we remained life-long friends, our paths crossing in Toronto, France (at Roger’s wedding), London UK, usually over long dinners, and eventually back in Victoria. Courage played an integral part of Heather’s life, a trait that she inherited from her parents, Olive and Norman, and passed onto her three children, Cecilia, Chrissy and Monica. Heather loved her daughters and they loved her back, steadfastly supporting her when times were tough. Condolences to her loving family: Mum, Olive; brothers, Roger and Nigel; and Heather’s wonderful “girls”, Cecilia, Chrissy and Monica. She’s looking down on us now, with a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eye. She will be missed by all who knew her. Love you, Heather. Here’s to you!
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JEANALYN I extend my sincere sympathy to the whole family during this period of mourning. She will be surely missed.
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Sharon Martin Dear Monica, we were saddened to learn from Emily of your mother’s passing. Although we didn’t know your mom, in reading the tribute, it’s clear she was an accomplished and remarkable woman. Our heartfelt condolences to you and your sisters. Sincerely, Byron and Sharon Martin, Ottawa
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Wendy Gedney To all Heather’s family,
My deep condolences for your loss. Heather was supporter of our street’s Block Watch program by phone. We appreciated her calls. Thinking of you all.
Sincerely,
Wendy Gedney
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Janet Andreae All who knew Heather knew her as the “Golden Girl”. Her shining blonde hair, her dazzling blue eyes, her infectious laugh/giggle, her warmth and kindness and her devotion to her girls. Heather could do anything, and she did. Her accomplishments were vast and often unsung. When she returned to Canada I was lucky enough to have been able to spend some time together with her. Life wasn’t easy for her and we shared a common ground in life at that time. Heather was an inspiration to me. She was strong, smart and resilient and a great support. She would overcome. But life was not fair and even against all odds Heather always shone. It may be a cliché, but she is still shining. Heaven just got a new star.
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Nesrine As I mourn your loss, I also feel privileged to have known you for the last few years of your life.
Although I didn’t know you for a long time, you were open enough and gracious enough to walk me through your life with all its victories and trials.
Our passes might have crossed as a patient and care provider , but you and your daughters always made me feel like part of the family , we shared lots of laughs and few tears .and I will always remember you with a Smile and a prayer for the beautiful courages soul you were .. Rest In Peace my friend .
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Judy Rest In Peace my friend.
My condolences to Cecilia, Monica and Christina.
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Jackie Wegren My dearest Heather, you were a warrior in this life, you endured every one of life’s challenges with strength and grace and you had more than your fair share.
You were a friend and an amazing mother, you loved your girls with a ferocity that I will never forget, they were your life!
I have sweet memories of watching you make french press coffee (I had no idea what this gadget was), in the mornings before heading to work, catching me up on your life as a young girl and the life you had in Europe with your sweet girls. Then you’d come home from work and share the events of the day and I would update you on the excitement, that only three girls could create in a day and we’d share a few giggles.
I can hear your voice now, speaking your daughter’s names…’Cilla, Mon, Chrissy, Mummy’s home’.
I am grateful that you are finally free of the constraints of this earthly world, but grieving for your family, especially for your girls.
I will think of you often, face to the sun, a brightly coloured scarf with jewelry to match and those gorgeous baby blues twinkling with each smile. I love you.
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Susan Patetson We are saddened by your loss.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Regards
Sue and Dave Paterson
Dear Cecilia, I’m so sorry to hear about your mother. I have often wondered if thanks to the internet our paths would cross again. You and I were fast friends in fourth grade at la chat in Switzerland. Sleepovers and horse riding top my list of those long ago days.
My thoughts are with you,
Penny